People think I’m a little on the weird side when I say I can feel other’s energy. We all can, some just don’t realize it. When someone’s in a bad mood, you can sense it without being within 10 feet of them! If someone’s overly joyful, same thing. You hear it, and that seems to trigger that feeling.

I don’t know, maybe I’m wrong. I will say thing though. I’ve met very few people that make me feel bad, but that jerk that’s living upstairs, is probably the worst one I’ve ever encountered.

Maybe it’s simply, his lack of respect. They have a new dog, haven’t even had her a week, and every day, he’s been cranking that music so loud i hear it over mine again. All I can think of, is that little girl. Apparently, she sleeps in the closet. I couldn’t imagine why.

He’s the reason I believe that I despise this place as much as i do at this moment. I hear him all the time. When he was gone, it was wonderful. Bliss even. Since he’s been back, I can’t even explain what it’s done to my peace of mind.

He’s a liar. A cheater. A thief. Everything I’ve heard and seen, he’s just the kind of person I don’t want to be anywhere near. And yet. He lives right above me. He’s not on the lease, and there’s nothing that can be done from the front office.

I feel violated, because I don’t have a choice in this matter. I’m forced into this scenario. Why? Because one of them can’t stand to be alone. Really? There aren’t any other gay men out there? I’m pretty sure that you can find one that is decent. Works. Doesn’t cheat. And doesn’t lie to you in every single breath! And if you are going to settle for that, shut up to me about it!

I’m so very excited to be getting away from this. I can’t wait to get into the new apartment, sage it sage it sage it and sage it again. And make it HOME.

I’ve never made this place home. I can understand why. I’ve really let some bad feelings settle here, and I can’t forget them. I want to leave it all behind, and start new. Get rid of the old, bring in some new. And live in a home. I’ve already gone my office idea. I’m going to see about getting a wall painted orange in there. I have the living room painted orange here, but I’d prefer my office I think.

Yes, I love orange. My favorite colors are orange, yellow, lime green and pink. Not a soft pink, but a brighter, deeper pink. I’ve come to find that the bright colors, make me happier.

I’ve also come to realize how much I truly like the sunshine. I always said I didn’t, but I lied. I don’t enjoy standing in it, but it’s so much better when everything is brightly lit up. When the sun’s out, the sky is blue. I like blue, it’s a bright color, and that too makes me smile.

I also like wind. Other people I work with, don’t. To me, when there’s wind, the air is cleaner. In Utah, we get these things called inversions. It’s a whole lot of smog. It’s because we’re in a valley, mountains on three sides. In the winter time, people let their cars warm up for way too long, and all of those emissions … well, they get socked in. There are others contributors, but the only thing that changes between summer and winter are the cars. Plain and simple. When the wind blows, it’s clearing that air out. The mountains are clear, and yes, that too makes me smile.

One thing I’ve come to not appreciate, is complainers. I’m really tired of those kinds of people to be honest. These kinds of people are the ones who like to start trouble, whatever that kind of trouble turns out to be. I’ve also learned, not to trust these sorts of people. They will throw you under the bus.

You, and everyone else they can grab a hold of on their way down.

There isn’t much else today. I’m tired. I realize that I’ve been working my keester off the last few weeks. I was talking to friend yesterday, and I realized I couldn’t remember the last time we’d talked. That can’t happen again. I have been working my butt off because I’m hoping to get new furniture next month. I dont’ want anyone to even think I am not doing my job, because that only pisses me off, and I have points to prove. In the last four days, I can honestly say that I have seen way too many different screens on that computer.

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